Anal Sex – Starting out
by jacquie30s – July 24, 2016
Hi I’m pretty new to anal and would like to be able to take my master’s cock. My question is probably pretty rudimentary, but i would appreciate any information on your own experiences.
If it’s painful at the beginning can it feel better once it is in, or does the pain just continue? I’m ok I think to take a bit of pain but I’m worried that too much will scare me off anal.
Now there are a number of rings of muscle around the anal canal which we group into the two structures we call the inner and outer anal sphincters. The pelvic floor muscles and other connective tissue and muscles support these structures. Stretching a muscle is not a problem. But when you start to feel pain from a muscle, depending on how much, that area might feel tender for some time after, if not during. Tearing a muscle is a show stopper for most people but not all. As with any other toren muscle, you will feel that for days after. Some people are into the pain and like to be reminded of it in the days that follow, but these people are not in the majority.
Hemorrhoids and fissures are funny things. They can be a show stopper but not necessarily. Loads of people have these things. Everyone can expect that they have or will have them at some time in their live. The overwhelming majority will never know. Anal sex is known to reduce the occurrence of these over time but badly executed anal sex can also be the cause of them in the beginning.
Friction pain can be internal or external and continues and increases until the friction stops. Lube is the solution for this.
There are also autonomic responses and bruising. These can present as referred pain.
At the end of the day the most important thing to achieve is trust. Trust in your own body’s abilities, trusting your partner and open communication is an essential part of this. The Top must respect the feelings, emotions and physical responses, if not the limits/limitations, of the Bottom. The Bottom must communicate when things are not going right, whether psychological or physical, and not be afraid to say stop. It is often a lot harder for the inexperienced Bottom to accurately describe what is/was going wrong. For the Top, is it often hard to hear any criticism. This you just have to work on.
The article Common Causes of Anal Sex Problems is a pretty good starting point for beginners and helps gives couples common language and understanding if things don’t go to plan.
Also remember that anal sex is not always difficult. Perfectly Easy Anal Sex – A success story is a good reminder of this very point.