The language of sex

Curious beings us humans. We have evolved in so many ways. Technology ensures that, except for the lowest on the socio-economic scale, our wants and needs are little more than the press of a finger away. Especially when it comes to our own sexual pleasure, aka vibrators and toys.

We now have all sorts of science, such as sociology, psychology and psychiatry to explain away our human reasoning and motivations. We have come to understand that our lives are the sum of our parents. The freedoms or options at our disposal in our formative years are entirely dependent on our parents’ choices, or lake thereof, which are determined by their lives.

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But post WWII capitalism has seen this massive human movement from working class to middle class. Some cultures and regions lag dramatically behind the Western world, but none are immune to the trend. A trend demanding more, better, bigger ostentatious lives and the things that makes lives better. Embedded into this is the social justice and consciousness that insists no one is left behind. Even the underclass have advocates to support them building modern lives.

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Yet, one thing has not evolved to the level of our advanced human civilization, is our language about sex. Its reflection on gender and the language about and for women’s sexuality and to an extent, how this lack of language shapes modern and somewhat notions of toxic masculinity.

This is the first article in a series of three. Here we start with the devolution of language.

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The devolution of the language of sex

Our 21st century hyper technological advances has handed us the internet, a web that made our world a lot smaller. It has ensured that we are now consuming more and more information, entertainment as well as junk food and the purchase of land fill. A rapid rate of consumption the speed of which previous generations have not had the privilege of or access to.

As we evolved into these learning machines we are yet to be given the language tools to adequately discuss sex. Sorry nay sayers, the generation coming might seem naive but they are smarter and much more informed than you imagine. In searching the internet, the results that are fed to us are a flood of click bait. Sex is sensationalized. Articles and videos propounding its physical and mental health benefits or pornographic images and videos full of distorted, brutal and mostly misogynistic takes on sexual acts.

The primary source of information of any subject now ensures that the language of sex remains superficial our or in the realm of the id, un-evolved and refusing to progress.

Yes, there is power in an image. An image can be analysed in a conceptual language that removes the emotions of the subject. History of art is a point in case. The nudes that celebrate the human body, are always celebrating human sexuality. They are designed to arouse. The nudes are suggestive, some would argue it is tasteful and classical. We analyse the nudity and have perfected the objective language to discuss this art without using the word sex. However, recent human history and the technology developments has given us the explosion of human sexual images. Historically, nudes were the purview of art sponsored by wealthy patrons. Today, along with the explosion in the human population, the floury of self promotion and the want to consume these images, we struggle to recall a language that refers to sex as a human need.

Where are we now?

And so we’ve allowed the internet, it’s promotion of click bait and porn, to define the language of sex. This has further devolved our own sexual understanding. It has devolved our sexual motivations and what makes us, tick sexually. Wrap this in a historical culture of shame, shame born out of religious dogma. Now we find ourselves caught between two extremes. We’ve complicated sex and sexual experience and decided that we all should collectively experience sex in private. In our beds, and in the last 20 years, with a device in our hand as a teacher. The shame of what we experience with regards to what we think sex should be, or how it should be experienced, has taken its toll. This results in us re that we are left struggling with on our collective sexual experience.

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